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Take That JLo, Marc Anthony’s New Girlfriend Is H.O.T.

January 5, 2012 by

The H.O.T. stands for Hot and Over the Top, as most Hispanic women are. I can say that, I’m Hispanic.


Whoa! If I was Jlo I’d be crying. First off, her name is Shannon De Lima. Any model with Lima in their name( i.e. Adriana Lima) are going to be hot. So If I was Jlo and I heard that Marc had a new girlfriend named Shannon De Lima, that’s when the first tear would fall. Then If I heard she was a Venezuelan model, the second tear would fall and then when I saw the above photo of her, I’d be sobbing.

Shannon and Marc are already professing their love for one another on twitter. Correction, Chase Muniz, Anthony’s son whom he adopted with a previous girlfriend. I could just see JLo being an evil stepmother!

Then Anthony tweeted:

It reads, “To my ShaDeLima, my statue of liberty, kisses.”

More like statue of sexual liberty.


Marc totally trumped JLo’s new piece.

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Hispanic Hump Day AKA Brazilian Hottie’s

January 4, 2012 by

I’m starting this new year right. It’s hard following my last Hispanic Hump Day post, I know I blew you all away with my final Hispanic Hump Day of 2011 so I thought the only way to start 2012 is to stay in the same vein. I’m keeping the Hispanic hottie’s Brazilian. Meet Brazilian, Carlo Porto.


Here are some fun facts about Carlo:

He’s hot.

Come on, do you need to know more than that?


Look at those eyes! Not enough? Fine, I’ll give you what you really want.


There you go! I think Carlo should only be in his underwear too.

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Everyone Is Getting Divorced!

January 4, 2012 by


I mean married, opps! Looks like Justin Timberlake is finally making Jessica Biel his wifey! Yay for marriage, hope it’s not fake like Brandi Glanville’s. I honestly can see Justin and Jessica making it for the long haul, but Mario Lopez and Courtney Mazza?


The Extra host proposed to his baby momma, they have a daughter, Gia, over the New Year’s weekend

“We took a walk alone as the sun was setting. I told Courtney that I wanted the mother of my children to have their last name. She was silent at first from shock, then she leaped for joy and did a little jete!”

I always thought Mario Lopez was living on the downlow. He’s wearing the same amount of foundation as Courtney in the above pic. J-saying!

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Janice Dickinson Topless On The Beach

January 3, 2012 by


Doesn’t Janice Dickinson look awful? I didn’t know she took out her breast implants. It also seems like her plastic surgery is melting away and congregating in her stomach.


Well at least it looks like Janice is back to her A cup she originally was in the 80′s-wait a second! That’s Steven Tyler, not Janice Dickinson! Moob alert!

It’s early people! Excuse me, I think my breakfast burrito is coming up.

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“Real Housewives” Star Marries Man, Craves Attention

January 2, 2012 by


Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Brandi Glanville, best known for not getting Eddie Cibrian to half-mast anymore, wed friend mixed martial arts manager (your guess is as good as mine on that one) Darin Harvey during a boozy New Year’s Eve Weekend in Las Vegas. Love didn’t bring this pair together, though. They just did it as a goof! LOL LMFAO OMG, BRANDI! GOOD ONE!
They’re already planning to annul this thing. OMG SO GOOD BRANDI IMMA PEE MY PANTZ! GILDA RADNER GLAD SHE DED CUZ U SO MUCH FUNNIERZ

“…seriously? For real? I just—I mean—fuck you, bitch”, said gay people everywhere.

My thoughts on Brandi’s newest union can best be described in this music video from Geri Halliwell.


geri halliwell—look at me by podalirius

T-Minus 2 days until this fucking halfwit lashes out at the media and society for making her feel feelings for fake-marrying someone in a blatant bid for attention when the right is denied to millions of people the world over, and how we should all feel ashamed of ourselves because of it! Sorry in advance, Brandi. Do get some photographic evidence of your face attempting to cry, though. That shit’ll be gold.

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Miley Cyrus Knows Smoking Is Cool

January 2, 2012 by


Miley Cyrus is vacationing in Hawaii for the New Year with on-again/off-again boyfriend Liam Hemsworth.


Good job Miley, he’s LA Rag Mag approved!


Oh Miley! Smoking is totes cool, but picking your wedgey? Not so cool! Supposedly Miley made quitting smoking one of her New Year’s resolutions, but it looks like Miley is like everyone else. She’s already breaking her New Year’s resolution only 24 hours after making them.

What are your fake New Year’s resolutions?

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