Archive for the '2008 Presidential Election' Category
February 8th, 2010
Yes, that could be our next President reading her palm.
The surprising thing isn’t that Robot Palin needs notes to get through her speech at the high-profile Tea Party Convention in Nashville. Every politician does, and most are savvy enough to utilize twentieth century technology such as teleprompters. But those magic word machines are too fancy schmancy for an ol’ fashion Alaskan huntress like Sarah, so she uses a twig and some ink from squashed berries!
The sad part are the key points she needed to remind herself up so badly so wrote them down on her moisturized palm. Showing us just how empty her promises are.
I don’t care what party you support she looks like an idiot with notes on her hand. Use a telepropter / magic word machine Sarah next time and save yourself some of that pretty face for Fox News.
Looking smug and you might say even a bit confident, Levi Johnston arrived in New York late last night to get ready to show off his johnson for his much anticipated Playgirl shoot. It’s scheduled later this week. I guess it takes him a week to prepare for a shoot. Lots of pubes to trim… manscaping!
Bristol Palin is a maneating young Republican with a thirst for teenage boys. First she was dating best friend Johnny, but then dumped him in the gutter for Levi. Now that Levi hates her, she’s gone running back into Johnny’s surprisingly open and forgiving arms. What a desperate douche!
Sources say Levi’s damaged daddy press tour is killing Bristol, and the only person she has to cry to is Johnny.
“Johnny feels terrible over what Bristol is going through. He thinks it’s hard enough being a new single mom, and on top of it, she has to cope with a breakup that people the world over are talking about.”
“Levi and Johnny had a big blowup during their sophomore year in high school when Levi and Bristol hooked up while she was still with Johnny. Bristol finally broke it off with Johnny for Levi, which pretty much ruined Johnny and Levi’s friendship.
“Johnny forgave Bristol quickly because he cared for her so much, but it took a long time before he and Levi became tight again.”
Sarah Palin should put a chastity belt on her Jr. babymaker so she’ll stop popping out kids just for one night of sex that makes her feel wanted. OK!?
Honestly, if the Palin’s were smart they’d ignore all this and we wouldn’t care in a month.
A: For about five minutes Tyra tries to get the family to say they wouldn’t vote for Sarah Palin but in the end, like the white trash idiots we all thought they were, Levi admits he’d still vote for Sarah Palin.
L: Is she high in this picture TOO! You think you know someone…
A: Do you smell that? It’s not change, it’s low grade coke at a party in Wilmington, Delaware mixed with baby laxatives! A “friend” of our Vice President’s daughter, Ashley Biden, is shopping a video around to all the rag mag’s of “a girl who looks like Ashley” snorting three lines of cocaine like a vaccum at a party. The video’s on the market for a mere $250,000 so I’m sure we’ll see it soon, but until then let’s not act shocked. Ashley was busted for pot posession in 1999, although daddy got her out of that one and the charges were dismissed.
The video shows a woman, who is represented by the seller and his attorneys to be Biden’s daughter Ashley, snorting several lines of cocaine.
The tape has been viewed by a RadarOnline.com freelance reporter who confirms the woman looks identical to Ashley Biden.
L: So we haven’t even seen stills form the video or any confirmation this is real, at this point. But who here thinks she looks like a totally coke head party chick on the weekends?!
A: It’s probably another evil smear campaign from the Republicans plotted to ruin her image.
L: Oh please!
A: I just checked Fox News and they’re distancing themselves from the story until it’s confirmed, like most media outlets. The solution is simple….daddy can I borrow $250,000 dollars for school stuff?
A: Wanna hear the how the mighty have fallen? That loving familly home Bristol and Levi swore they were going to give their daughter has dissipated into the truth which is…they should have used a condom instead of strapping grandma with another kid to raise. In fact, Grandma has released a statement. L: This is soo trashy, you are NOT a political figure if you’re talking about your daughter’s break up in the press. Bianca (best friend): They’re from Alaska, have you ever met someone from Alaska? A: My friend Leslie’s from Alaska and she’s normal, but she’s also a Democrat in Alaska which is hard to find, if you don’t count the wildlife’s vote. The statement comes after Levi’s sister sold their family feud details to Star Magazine.
“Unfortunately, my family has seen many people say and do many things to `cash in’ on the Palin name,” said the statement, which was issued through the governor’s political action committee. “Sometimes that greed clouds good judgment and the truth.”
A:Levi Johnston held the biggest press conference Alaska’s ever seen his doorstep, telling the AP it’s officially over between the two and they haven’t been together for awhile.
Earth to Levi we all stopped caring when you lost the election. The real victim here is the Democratic Party whom didn’t get to see this family fall apart at the seems inside the White House.
Bianca:The victim here is that poor baby because they weren’t married and their relationship was crappedy crap crap!
L: What if you got pregnant right now?
B: I don’t want to play this game right now. Not even hypothetically.
We want to see photographic evidence of the second coming of Jesus, or in other words Sarah Palin’s new grandson, Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston. Bristol Palin’s new baby’s bidding started at $100,000 but quickly soared after the father, 18 year oldLevi Johnston’s, mother’s OxyCotin related arrested hit the news. Cue the banjo music.
The real question is will the Palin’s keep the money or give it to charity like Brad and Angelina? Devils or Do Gooders?
Rick Warren arrogantly laughs off Ann Curry’s question during their interview and then claims to have a 100 gay friends.
We don’t even have 100 gay friends! Do you have 100 black friends too?
How are we suppose to have hope in Obama when the first thing he does is screw over the gay community with a blatant homophobic pastor to give his prayers. Obama… a man who ran his campaign on hope, diversity, and change. Now asks Pastor Rick Warren to give his inauguration speech and the gays are pissed! We feel betrayed and shut out of the “change” we worked so hard to create and support.
Rick Warren is one of those God fearing pastors that goes around spewing fear tactics to scare his followers into submission. This pastor is a lost lamb in God’s teachings of love and has compared same-sex nuptials to approving polygamy and pedophilia.
Some are asking for Rick Warren to step down, but Obama is not, and now that he got our vote we’re of no use to him anymore.
In the words of our reader Dennis, we just got screwed in the ass by Obama with no KY.
del.icio.us 
digg
