L: We’ve known Alexis for some time now… but this is our first time doing the whole family thing with her. It was great.
A: I do have to say when Alexis invited us to spend Easter with her family I didn’t believe it, but Alexis never lies to me so I picked out an banging Easter outfit.
L: We arrivied at a white modern mansion decorated with the most eclectic taste I had ever seen. It was like bohemian meets beach, with glammed out bathrooms… art everywhere. Patricia’s house was right on the cliff and she greeted us with a genuine smile as I passed her the Veuve Clicquot and Mini Krispy Kreme’s we had brought. Not like she needed anything, Patricia’s table had an organic spread fit for a Whole Foods Staff meeting.
A: We had to thank Patricia for including us because this wasn’t a big party like we thought. It was rather intimate. There were probably 20 people there with kids. So there’s all these fabulous kids running around, all looking like Baby Gap models, and one latches onto to Lynn & me, because suddenly we’re best friends and after hanging out all day I realize this is one of the Getty kids. He was adorable. 
I loved how the parents & Patricia, allowed their kids to play with any toy they wanted. They had trucks and sparkle Barbies in the same basket with pink unicorns and no one cared. No parent ripped a doll out of any boys hands or a gun out of a girl’s hand. So refreshing compared to my family gatherings and the toy box. I’ve had an Aunt take a Collectible Figurine out of her son’s hand at easter and say, “Oh Alex, his father would kill me if he saw him playing with dolls.”
L: Oh remember when Patricia called me evil?
A: Rosanna Arquette got locked in the pantry for a few minutes and was banging on the door for help but no one heard her over the screaming children. Someone finally gets her out and Lynn could not stop laughing at how freaked out she was to be locked in a space that is the size of our kitchen.
L: That’s when Patricia called me out because I was laughing too hard. So I escaped outside to smoke by the pool and who comes walking in but Milla Jollavich, her director husband, and her stunning daughter.
A: Yeah and you said she looked like a model baby, and everyone paused until I said, she IS a model baby. We had a moment me and Milla.
L: When?
A: I was pouring the Champagne and she ran over for some so we toasted.
L: PLEASE! Milla, and I were smoking outside with LUKE PERRY and Alexis.
A: I’m so glad you controled yourself around Luke because I know you adored him as a litle gay boy.
L: You have no idea Alex! Ok I used to turn off my Swatch Watch phone ringer off and put on my headphones on my TV so I could watch 90210 with no interruptions. Then there he was… next to me… still with that tight little body and we’re having a cigarette together. I die!
A: Did you see that big hole in the back of his shirt? I could see the small of his back the whole time. I hate how heart throbs like Luke can just roll out of bed and throw on a hat. I threw a fit at the dry cleaners over a stain on my white Gucci pants and he’s wearing a trucker hat?! Why did I bother?
L: Anyways, back to me! So I helped Patricia hide the Easter eggs and got a moment to tell her it was nice to be included in her family’s event. She’ just like she is on TV’s Medium, very sweet, funny, real… and a great mother.
A: So that’s when David Arquette arrived with Coco and let me tell YOU!! He is sooooo much hotter in real life. One of the few celebrities where that is the case. All these dads were going around, David included, sucking on huge cigars… many with their shirts off. Can you say gay heaven?
L: David was really cool though we talked about his charity, Feeding America, that we heard him give a speech on at the ACUI.
A: I had done my research and knew his father converted to Islam and his mother was Jewish, much like my crazy family and we got to talking about that too. It’s weird though, I come from a small town, so to go inside and see the lives these “Hollywood Families” live just shows me more and more that all families are the same. Even if you have an oceanfront view. There was a moment where I just laid out on the deck in the Malibu sun and told myself this is all I want in life.
L: It was one of the best Easter I’ve had in a long time. Thanks to Patricia & Alexis.
A: Do you think we’ll be invited back?
L: DEF! After getting all their kids high on mini Krispe Kremes! We’re totes in!
Email | Permalink |
del.icio.us | 
digg
