A:Britney loves an orgy scene in her videos and now the fans in the UK will get to experience an ‘If You Seek Amy’ after party sex party behind the leather curtains. After each of her 11 shows at the O2 Arena, Britney will host a small private party called Masturbating MommiesClub Dada and will feature naked acrobats, topless burlesque babes and dancing dwarves.
L: Are the dancing dwarves her two little boys, because that’s so cool 70’s mom of Britney to let them get into the business so early?
A: Why no sex after parties in America, ‘Cool Mom’? Too frigid or does she just like foreskin?
Yucksies! Britney Spears is truly a mess. It was just last week when we posted video of Britney’s hair extensions coming off on stage during a concert.
Girl, you need to be doing crotch checks before you get on stage. Isn’t this like the second time you have had crotch issues on stage. Remember when your thingy was hanging out and you screamed at the wardrobe people and you were still mic’d. That was funny. This latest scandal is just super nasty… really nasty. It’s tampon string time people. Spot the string on or out of Britney and you win… or lose. Depending on what you’re into.
L: Traffic sucks in LA… unless you’re Britney Spears, ya’ll!
Britney Spears added a CHP escort to her entourage yesterday. They escorted her highness 28 miles, from Calabasas to the Staples Center in Downtown L.A. Sirens were swirling and horns were honking… it was the real deal. Out of her way bitches. Apparently she was running late for a concert and needed the escort to make the scheduled show. Can’t you just hire a better assistant?
Don’t be fooled by the Orange County soccer mom look that Britney has going on for bits of her, “If You Seek Amy”, music video. For most of the video we see Britney in lingerie and wrapped in male dancers with glistening chests.Britney Spears must be ready for some sex’in. Her newest and sexiest video has just been posted on her website. Check it out.
L: Wowsies. This is straight up orgy’ness. Love the pelvic thrusting.
A: Why is Britney always alluding to the fact that she lives a double life?
L: What are all those panties doing on the floor?
L: OMG - Her with the dancers… It’s like a Britney bukakee party. I die!
A: Can I use this masturbation choreography on the dance floor?
A: While Britney relaxed by the pool and waited for the sun to tan her tour bruises, her father was making all her backup dancers undergo the contractual drug test. Jaime Spears is a self made DEA agent and the country he has sworn to protect is Britney. He warned all the dancers when they started that this would be a dry tour to keep B away from temptation.
Unfortunately, three of the dancers couldn’t be around Jaime unless they were ON drugs.
‘They begged to be given a second chance but were shown the door. Britney and the dancers spent months rehearsing before the tour started and they had become more like family. But the show must go on and such behaviour won’t be tolerated. The remaining dancers have been read the riot act.’-DM
If we get to interview you Britney we’ll slip you some goodies.
A: Can we say pussy? Is it offensive? It sounded offensive when it came out of Britney’s mouth during her Tampa concert last night. Contrary to what everyone thinks Britney’s not stupid. She knew her mic was on, this is the real Britney! Catch a glimpse before the fake one takes over again!
L: I think her mic was supposed to be turned off but I love that it was in a southern accent. Who says that?
A: Bless the soul who was running video at this special moment. We heard that this happened but wanted to wait for the video, put this one in the Britney archives because it’s a classic!
A: After worrying herself sick that she might not live up to everyone’s expectations, the pictures from Britney’s stellar performance last night in New Orleans answers any questions. The mixed reviews are in, fans say she gave it to us full force, while critics say she was “visibly nervous” and her dancing “wasn’t tight”. Who the hell cares, when you have these many sparkly costumes to look at? No wonder she had to have Virgin mobile, and Candies sponsor this endeavor, it looks more expensive than Amy Winehouse’s tab in St. Lucia!
WE get to see each side of Britney via her costume changes so let’s break it down!
A: Trashy Britney has an obsession with tramp stamps and wishes her body could be covered in this much trash.
A: Britney showed the audience her new dildo halfway through.
L: When Britney said Circus I didn’t know she meant that gay bar down on Santa Monica Blvd. A: Britney said the metal codpiece tasted like batteries.
A: This is one of those dancing sequences where everyone commented Britney was so OFF, probably because she just went number 2 in her costume.
A: Gliding above the crowd like an angel, Britney thinks about jumping off and ending it all but then she’d ruin her hair.
A: The grand finale was Womanizer in a cop uniform but sources say Britney just look relieved it was over. Our question is how does she prevent herself from jumping on that backup dancer?
All in all everyone’s giving Britney cheers not jeers, and it seems with all this coverage she’s bound to sell more tickets. You can see more stills and coverage at our friend’s site, but it gets a little NSFW.
A: Britney Spears is ready to do just about anything to get you to shell out your hard earned money. To celebrate the kickoff of her tour she put this sneak peek video of the rehearsals on her site moments ago. Want to see Britney walk on a wire? Buy a ticket! Want to see elephants, whips and fire? Buy a ticket!
Why isn’t anyone buying damn tickets!?
Maybe if her press agent releases the details of the tour the day after we all heard the ticket sales were suffering, that will help. Today her US tour kicks off in New Orleans and she still has 31 cities to go and many seats to sell. We have never been tour people. Something about being smashed up against a mixture of teenage girls and gays and screaming at a dot on the stage never appeals to us. We prefer to dance in our living room to her videos, in privacy so no one can laugh at our music video reenactment.
It’s not called a “comeback” it’s a “return” and although it sounds spectacular, I’ll wait for the blue ray DVD.
Will you go to the Circus when it comes to your town?
A: You know I love you Britney, but I can’t support this new Candies move. Candies is one step above Sketchers, just by association alone it’s a bad move. Look at this picture, who is this?! This isn’t the slutty bi polar, chain smoking Britney I know and love..this is “Lucky” Britney. 90’s Britney.
Spears will be featured in a campaign that will run in print, TV, in-store at Kohl’s and online. Kohl’s and Candie’s will also be part of Spears’ promotional activities, and, in true multimedia cross-platforming, the pop star will wear Candie’s apparel, footwear and accessories in a music video off her current album, “Circus.”
Eww yucky Candies in her video? Stop the madness. How are we suppose to take your RETURN seriously if you sell out to companies that are a few months away from caving?
L: This is only forgivable because she needs the money to finance her Circus of a tour.
Briteny/her father and mother, never want to see Adnan or Sam Lufti again now that she’s on the straight and narrow. She sent her high priced lawyers into court this morning asking for them to “protect her from Sam and Adnan.”
Armed with God only knows what evidence from their crazy nights together, to block any contact the with them because allegedly “she was afraid of them both and hoped they could be locked up in jail”.
Expect an Adnan or Sam Lufti tell all bestseller in a matter of months. L: Just FYI Brit, a restraining order won’t stop the vaginal itching.
You can’t run away from your problems, but you sure as hell can move from the house you were carried out of on a stretcher. Britney must have been sick of walking past the bathroom she locked herself in with her kids that infamous night so she’s decided to sell it for 7 million.
Her father asked the court for permission to sell the mansion filled with horrors last June, to relocate to a more modest shack. When we say shack, we mean a 10,000 sq foot palace called Chateau Suenos, which is located in an exclusive gated community in the Calabasas area of Los Angeles, and cost over nine million dollars.
When our friend David Shannon received the Britney album Circus for Christmas we were shocked. Two best songs, that we’d been twirling to like a Gay-sian on the dance floor in our living room for weeks, didn’t make the cut.
Much like Britney’s real life, the entertaining Britney has been replaced by bore snore rule following Britney. You know the one that DOESN’T get high.
Here’s a semi autobiographical song title TROUBLE, where Bad British Britney wants to get down to a heavy beat.
And the rumored song about her and Kevin having phone sex PHONOGRAPHY, is our entire clique’s guilty pleasure.
Touch yourself and listen to the the deluxe album.
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