John Mayer’s Rolling Stone cover is the best he’s looked so far! Considering this is the same magazine that named him the world’s ugliest rock star. It’s amazing what some tats and masturbating can do. He tells Rolling Stone that he likes to strum his human instrument a lot.
“I am the new generation of masturbator,” he explains. “I’ve seen it all. Before I make coffee, I’ve seen more butt holes than a proctologist does in a week… I have masturbated myself out of serious problems in my life. The phone doesn’t pick up because I’m masturbating. And I have excused myself at the oddest times so as to not make mistakes. If Tiger Woods only knew when to jerk off. It has a true market value, like gold bullion.”
To clarify, John says the underlying reason for his mass masturbation isn’t necessarily to please some carnal urge, but
“because I want to take a brain bath. It’s like a hot whirlpool for my brain, in a brain space that is 100 percent agreeable with itself.”
I wonder if one of those mistakes he is talking about his Jennifer Aniston? Here is what he told Rolling Stone about her.
”I’ve never really gotten over it. It was one of the worst times of my life.”
He adds, “I have this weird feeling, a pride thing, for the people I’ve had relationships with. What would I be saying to Jen, who I think is f**ing fantastic, if I said to her, ‘I don’t dislike you. In fact, I like you extremely well. But I have to back out of this because it doesn’t arc over the horizon. This is not where I see myself for the rest of my life, this is not my ideal destiny.”
Ouch, that has to hurt a lot. BTW you can read what else told Rolling Stone that is out now where he looks absolutely dreamy. Watch the behind the scenes shoot to get 50′s poof hair like Johnny!
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Dave here says:
HE IS SO HOT N THAT PIC
melchor says:
well, i dont know if how often does tiger woods masturbate,,lol…anyway check out this cool video of him, not silly thing!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SBB4x8GYxsU