UPDATE 4:50 PM: TMZ has learned Lindsay Lohan will not be arrested, because she has already posted her $100,000 bail and the arrest warrant has been recalled. Her lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley, will be in court on Monday at 8:30 AM. The judge will then set a date for a probation violation hearing.
If you were under a load of work today like me you probably need to get up to speed on the Lindsay Lohan dramer. There’s no way around it… Lohan’s going to detox in a cellblock with girls who really are lesbians. Here’s how it went down in six easy steps!
1. Lindsay says she can’t fly home from Cannes (where she’s falling down drunk at 5AM the night before her court hearing in the US) because someone “stole” her passport.
2. Frantic to get home for her court date, Lohan sends around a No -Chance-last-minute email to her “friends” asking to borrow their private jet. Shocker: Lindsay (like me) doesn’t have friends with their own private jet. She’s Lindsay Lohan not Lynne Spears. Those “friends” leaked her email to Radar and here it issss…
I need my friends, and people I work with to PLEASE help me get on a private plane tomorrow by at least 5pm. This is such a horrible thing that’s happened to me and extremely unfortunate. My passports been stolen and the day before my court hearing. I would never ask such a thing, but if there’s anything that I could ever ask of anyone, it would be to help me with this. I must get back on a jet to LA tomorrow. If anyone has planes leaving Nice/Cannes at any time after 11am when I get my passport, please, please, let me know if you can help me. God bless All my love Thank you, Lindsay Lohan
(Crickets) (Crickets)
3. French police announced today that Lindsay never reported a stolen passport. So she’s a liar and a freckle face.
4. The judge releases a warrant for Lindsay’s arrest, and it’s been reported she’s being stopped at customs by police. Those pics will be fun!
5. Prosecutors say they want proof Lindsay had a plane ticket.
6. It’s just all too much. Linds has no where to turn. So she does what she’s always done. Lindsay blames her father for her lost passport.
“My passport’s been stolen. It’s clearly an inside person who works with my father that has been sent to set me up. He’s been threatening me.”-Lindsay to Gossip Cop.com
Let’s get real here people. Going to jail for Lindsay is the equivalent of booking a new film or getting a movie of the week. This is BIG for Linds and she’s thrilled everyone is talking about her, and not in that way we all talk about her after she leaves.
Did she not get the memo? Jail is soooooo 2007.
